Finally, the candidates discuss the real issues. And just in time for election day, too!
(Oh, I guess I should mention the candidates’ actual words are in white and my very slight modifications are in yellow.)
Happy Voting Day my fellow Gardener-Americans. Let’s still all be friends when it’s over.
No partisan comments or I will find out where you live and throw kudzu seeds in your yard.
Black Walnut Dispatch 
I was recently in Oxford, Mississippi, where they have lots of kudzu. It eats entire forests. I have to say it’s really pretty, the way the giant draping shapes completely engulf the trees.
I agree. Yesterday I was walking through the woods and came upon some abandoned buildings covered with kudzu. It was rather fantastical. It was also another reminder that nature can actually kick our ass and turn our settlements into dust.
Whoever promises to add White Tail Deer to the terrorist kill list gets my vote.
Ha! Good point! We need to create a terrorist kill list for plenty of plant species, too.
I so wish that they were saying things like this. About a week ago, I turned off the news, and it’s staying off until Wednesday morning (maybe longer). Do I really need to know who’s president?
My dream is to see Obama and Romney strolling the Chanticleer Teacup Garden together arm-in-arm after the election.
And whoever wins hiring its chief designer to re-design the White House grounds.
Yes! Red begonias be gone!
Glad Kudzu would incinerate upon immediate impact in Abq…and that’s the “weak” Nov-Jan sun!
But I digress – great embellishments on what they might say, especially coming from that very special Gray area we know of… (Rod Serling voice)
Thanks, David. I didn’t know kudzu wouldn’t grow out there. Is there a Great Smothering Vine of the Southwest? It seems like every region has one!
Thank you for making my day after being severely tired of all election coverage.
You’re welcome, Caitlin. I’m glad you liked it!
Enjoyed this post. Only thing is the rhetoric was far too reasonable and specific to be realistic. What I want to know is, who is going to appoint Piet Oudolf Secretary of Perennials?
Ha! What about a Sustainability Czar? I’d take that job!
LOVE IT. Thanks for the laugh!
You’re welcome, Tami. Thanks for reading!
Even here in Australia we will be glad to have an end to US election coverage. You must be going CRAZY. The election rallies are fascinating though – we don’t have that here at all. Why do they go and shout their message at large crowds of people who already agree with them?
Really, you don’t have rallies? I had just assumed those were universal. Shows what I know….
And yes, everybody is so fatigued. Let’s just hope that the winner is decided quickly and decisively!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!♥♥
So funny, Mary! I saw these images floating around on FB before the election but didn’t realize they were your creation. I should have known!