To follow up on my Top Ten Garden Buzzwords posts, here is a neat little doo-dad introduced to me by Stephen Ray, a landscape architect in the ASLA LinkedIn group:
The Landscape Urbanism BS Generator
Once you’ve opened the link, simply click on the “Make Bullshit” button, and voila! instant Landscape Architecture/Urban Planning Jargon BS is created for you!!
I also wish somebody would invent a Pretentious Anglophilic Suburban Subdivision Name Generator, to randomly generate names in this well-loved format:
“The _________ at _________ ____________”, as in “The Mews at Crustington Manor”
A Gingko tree in my neighborhood in fall splendor. (Note the unsightly golden leaves on the lawn.)
I had a whole nuther post written where I really had fun with with leaf blower double entrendres, but I decided that was a cheap trick and beneath me. But I had to keep the title.
I live in a neighborhood where the Autumn Leaf Anality Index is pretty high. I’d say about 8 out of 10. If you allow your leaves to linger on your front lawn for too many days, you may be considered suspect. Perhaps you won’t get an invitation to the 4th of the July block party. Kids may avoid your house at Halloween. What? You say you have a heavily wooded lot and it just seems natural to let some of the leaves sit and decay where they are? Sorry, no dice! Allowing leaves to accumulate on your property is outrageous, unsightly, and downright un-American!
Look what one of my neighbors did to his poor maple tree just so that he wouldn’t have so many autumn leaves to deal with in the fall. If you look closely, you’ll see that he basically hacked off the top third. Tragic! Better to cut the tree down altogether than leave this mangled specimen standing:
A neat lawn doesn't make up for the deformed tree.
This final shot was taken in the neighborhood adjacent to mine, where the Leaf Anality Index is 10/10. Good thing they’re getting rid of all that organic matter now so they will have plenty of room to lay down giant piles of mulch in the spring:
Also note the FOUR AC units along the house in the background.