Top Five Ludicrous Outdoor Bedrooms

In the spirit of Valentine’s Day, HGTV thinks it would be super-romantic if you and your honey set up a luxurious bed out in the backyard so the two of you can giggle under the cherry blossoms and then sleep under the stars! 

Dreamy picture, eh?

But here’s what will happen if you try this at your house, with your actual partner: 

*Your mattress will acquire permanent mud-stains from being dragged through the thawing spring garden.

*As you are gazing at the robin’s egg blue sky, an actual robin will crap on your forehead.

*The sound of your next-door neighbor’s leafblower will seriously compromise the quality of your al fresco lovemaking.